As I read the NYT yesterday, I couldn't help but compare and contrast two articles on gay life in this country. They say a lot about where one can find the "real" America, the "heartland" of our nation.
The first and most obvious was a front page story detailing the "relentless antigay bullying" in the Anoka Hennepin school district, north of Minneapolis, MN. It's so horrible that six students have taken the risk of suing the school district; the Department of Justice, happily, is investigating the district for its failure to stop the bullying. The district has also suffered eight suicides over the past two years. School officials deny that the bullying has anything to do with the deaths; friends and family sharply dispute that assertion.
The district's failure to respond to the physical and psychological abuse can be traced directly to the gag order passed in 2009 and supported by "Christian" groups allied with the local Congresswoman, Michele Bachmann (You knew that was coming, didn't you?). It says that “teaching about sexual orientation is not part of the district-adopted curriculum” and that staff “shall remain neutral on matters regarding sexual orientation.” In practice, it appears that, by singling out gay and lesbian students, the policy gives bigots free rein to attack those students, with little fear of school authorities. Any change in the policy is being fiercely opposed by the Minnesota Family Council, among others. They and their allies label loving gay relationships "abnormal and unhealthy." They prefer, the article notes, to blame GLBTQ activists for the suicides and bullying, arguing "that depression among gay teenagers is often the fault of gay rights advocates who create hopelessness: 'When a child has been deliberately misinformed about the causes of homosexuality and told that homosexual acts are normal and natural, all hope for recovery is taken away.'”
Meanwhile, you could read about one of those abnormal and unhealthy relationships elsewhere in the paper. Harold Leads and Wheaton Galentine met (where else?) at the Rockefeller Center skating rink in 1944. They became a couple nearly immediately and moved in together, first on 48th Street and then in the Village. They owned a lovely home there, rented an apartment to Tim Gunn for 16 years, had first their house and then the one next door turned into "Carrie Bradshaw's home," and stayed together until Harold died in 2002. Wheaton joined him this past June, still speaking and thinking of Harold until the end. They laughed, loved, and lived in spite of the obstacles they faced for much of their lives. They entertained 1000s, supported many charities, and generally had a life I admire more than I can say.
Of course, GLBTQ folks don't have to "earn" their freedoms and rights through monogamous relationships. No matter your love life, you shouldn't have to endure someone who decides to piss on your head, a practice that little concerns the Anoka Hennepin school district or Ms. Bachmann. But the next time you watdch a Republican debate and hear the good Congresswoman go on one of her rants about the "homosexual agenda," spare a thought for Harold and Wheaton. I like to imagine them smiling gently at the foolisness of the mortals, and holding hands as they look across unimaginable vistas.
